"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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