WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
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You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
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I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.