a bad idea.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?