Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize