5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize