just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Randomize
