i don't like sucking hair
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize