You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
