He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
