i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
