Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
