so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I need moral support for this bender
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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