Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
