I think i sorta joined a cult last night
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
