she was so not down for the gang bang
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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