just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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