Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
