Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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