Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
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