man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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