How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
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how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
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Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once