I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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