shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Randomize
