Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
