You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
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