i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
