i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
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