I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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