It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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