he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
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I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
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I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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