he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
