Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
