Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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