VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
