ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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