My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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