none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
