It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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