We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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