I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Randomize