Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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