Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
There r osticjed everywhere
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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