I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
