Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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