dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
