garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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