yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
