I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize