What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
