You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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