I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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