but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
