some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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